Winding down

April's literally flown by! May get's here tomorrow, and I'm off again~! A long weekend was too good to pass up for some serious beach time :D Can't wait to hit the clear blue water.

This week's been a mini food rampage- an Ikea dinner on Monday, a Brewerkz dinner and drinks on Wednesday, a Turkish lunch and Bakerzin sandwich splurge on Thursday. Whew! And we topped that up with another cinnamon melt.. Gawd. And I still haven't quite recovered from the weekend's cuisinistic escapades. You can never have too much cinnamon though.. or chocolate.. or coffee.. :D

Birthday madness, and the scavenger hunt around the office. I've never clocked in so early before :p Happy 24th QJ! That ridiculous looking bird tops the list of 'best gifts ever', if I do say so myself  :D And the redhead cactus comes in a close second haha.

Now for the sadness- chica's gone next Wednesday. I'm ecstatic for her, but I'm going to miss her to death :( She's been a combined mom, sister, girlfriend, inspiration, fashionista, anchor, shoulder, scone buddy and so much more- and we've only got a week left. Make the most of it and mourn later I think :)

Lingerie shopping with a boy for a girl provides for an evening of endless laughs and funny awkward moments :D I hope you got there safe and the gift was well received! ;) What is with all that lace though?! And frills and ribbons and polka dots...Urgh.

A shift's coming up soon, and I'm excited/anxious/scared as hell. Hopes and beat skippin' heart in check, for now at least.. *fingers crossed*

Of cinnamon melt-downs and the great outdoors

The wonders of mushroom soup and sleep :) The fever went away in the end, but I still had to clock in a bit from home. Messages from all over and a human thermometer- thanks you guys :D Caught up on all the missed TV shows and read a bit- the ideal vacation if I hadn't been hitting 39°!

An Ikea lunch, Ikea hotdogs and an Ikea dinner, spaced a couple of days apart. Craaaazy~! But the chocolate mousse is to die for.. *drool* The cinnamon bun hunt all the way to Somerset 313 and that idiotic customer service dude who got my blood boiling.. Urgh. Why is the service industry in Singapore so crappy?

Ravi and Ravi, spray wars at Mustafas, insane giggling at City Square Mall, pol sambol + gotukala + dhal and a cinnamon melt marathon. We were on a roll! Saturday saw 3 go down with the help of a chocolate fudge sundae, Sunday saw 2 more with a cappucinno on the side. The melts are like little bits of heaven in sugary syrup ♥ And Mr Google redefined the concept of 'finishing your food' haha.

The Blind Side is a pretty good movie- it gets you thinking, even at 3 in the morning, and it restored a little bit of my faith in humanity :) Sandra Bullock still has a fan in me! I loved the gutsy character she played, though whether it was Oscar worthy, I'm still undecided :p He's Just Not That Into You was just as good watching it for the 3rd time as it was the 1st :D Chicken curry and Kahlua (separately!) only added to the day's pigging out- I'll need to starve myself for a week before I return to normal! And then we watched movie trailers till 4am.. *sigh*

Tried out the circle line for the first and second time, and hit Max Brenner after aaaages! A crazy route through Dhoby Ghaut to the Esplanade to Clarke Quay and then Harbourfront- more time spent in trains than outside, catching up with Mr Shutterbug while he foursquared away :p

Then came Sunday! After struggling to wake people up, having more back out and missing breakfast, Mr Google, Prem and moi finally took to route 3 in Macritchie :D A grand total of 4 hours, 12km, the Petai trail, the Blue and Pink maps, the monkeys on the car and all over, the HSBC treetop walk, lots of steps and more mosquitoes! I think Avatar had the connection with nature thing down to point- there's just something uplifting trudging through the undergrowth with insects and birds chirping away and the smell of earth and fresh air all around you. The heart rate went up and the endorphins got to work- which saw me bouncing to beats on the bed and whacking Mr Google with a tiger. After I shaved his head, and before chased them around the garden for my wallet and attempted riding a child's scooter..'Nuff said.

A hug on a Monday morning, a drenched trek through Bras Basah at lunch (thanks QJ!), new found respect for MS Paint, a surprisingly decent creative exploit and two projects down :) Hung out with the sibling on what was a beautiful evening around 7pm, and had quite the interesting shopping experience :D

We all have our crosses to bear, but that doesn't mean we forget how to smile.. right? :) I'm terrible when it comes to taking my own advice though. But I sat there in the dark yesterday, listening to this on loop [came across it on trailer night!] and felt like someone out there understood :)

A chaotic Tuesday which began with 3 different warbrobe shifts and harried phone calls in between. Yeah, I forget things sometimes, like important client meetings :p Was feeling frustrated and annoyed and sad and let down all at once, but weekend plans cheered me up :D Just one of those days when you wake up and wonder what you're doing with your life I guess..


Down with the sickness :( I think the fever worsened during the night and I had all these weird dreams which I can't remember now! Though I woke up like 5 times, after each dream.. Urgh. And it's the weird kind of sick, where I feel like a trainwreck but my temperature is stubbornly remaining normal-ish. How I wish I were in bed right now..

Have you ever randomly thought of someone and had them text you or call you a few minutes later? Ethereal stuff, but it always makes me grin :D

The new blogs are cool! There's so much beauty out there in the world, sometimes just around the corner. And it's always a comfort that there are people who still stop, look around them, appreciate and share. Photography to me has always been a way of extending my memory and looking at the world through someone else's eyes. And my two cents' worth on Photoshop: it does make things look prettier but also messes with originality and skill, to a certain extent.

Ok that was very random :p

Song of the morn (that's still playing in my head!): 
Promises mean everything when you're little
And the world's so big
I just don't understand how
You can smile with all those tears in your eyes
Tell me everything is wonderful now..


Back to the timesheets nightmare and samahan.. *sniffle*

Everything, and nothing

Watching the storm gather just after sundown has become a daily routine. The expanse of sky and colour from the 17th floor is amazing, and if only the windows weren't so dirty, all the reports and papers I'm supposed to be working on would've been abandoned long ago for some quality shutterbug time in our little corner :)

The office warming was on Friday, which led to a hunt for sausage rolls during lunch and some rib-cracking conversations among the scribes. And just like all MTM parties, the alcohol flowed freely, everyone was merry and there was too much food :D Some pol sambol turned up too! You gotta love diversity- specially when it translates into sushi, guacamole, pasta and curry, among other things :D

The hunt for the glasses began afterward, but we sat down for a while on the benches and watched the fountain lights change colour. And after hitting 7 of the 9 places, running down an escalator going up and forcing one guy to open shop 10 mins after closing time, we ended up watching Date Night :D

Shutterbugs Inc took to the streets of Singapore on Saturday, but first was the Mongolian lunch buffet courtesy Prem :) The sauce recipes were something else! Totally recommended if you have a lot of time to spend and a healthy appetite. Clarke Quay is an entirely different world in the day- there even were kids splashing around in the fountain :D (Attica looks like hell btw- but the colour contrast and vibrancy of the surrounding buildings makes up for the drabness).

Catching up over Irish cream coffee on a lazy weekend afternoon- my kind of thing :D Sometimes talking to people who know you really well helps you realise and remember things about yourself that you otherwise overlook or momentarily forget :) Trapaising through CQ, City Hall and the Esplanade while being model of the day, walking through the weird sound simulation between ears and hitting the rooftop terrace- all in a day's work, only to be rewarded by that huge root beer float :D

Another spontaneous Sunday, with a huge koththu lunch and a trek from Potong Pasir to Boon Keng with Mr Google and his GPS, aiyo :D I needed an adrenaline fix, and we decided to be adventurous and headed to Punggol to explore the beach there. The route to the beach is amazing~! Punggol is such a quiet area till you get to the LRT- which we rode for kicks :D Fields and trees and more empty green space- reminiscent of the foresty areas in Scandinavia. The beach was terrible though- there was a dead something on the shoreline, scores of plastic bottles and bags, and weird gunk and junk in the water with almost dead jellyfish floating around.. *shudder* And yet there were families happily fishing on the pier and splashing around in the water :| Saw a guy catch a lobster looking thing and proudly show it off before running off with it- I really hope that wasn't dinner! But a walk along the beach, a gorgeous sunset mixed with storm clouds and some pretty strong gusts of wind made up for the rest :D

Monday came, and Monday went. Discoveries of a happy kind, interspersed with an orange + chocolate chip muffin, a surprise coffee delivery and the Goo Goo dolls- a new album coming out peeps! :D The rain came down in torrents the moment I thought about going home, so I sat by the window and waited it out a bit. Hang in there dude! The hard part's over :)

Tuesday and a weird emo morning. Shinedown, Kid Rock and Sum 41; Stef finally intervened when she found out I was listening to the likes of Miley Cyrus :D Yep, that extreme! Only because it was on a soundtrack though, in my defense. Cranberry orange muffins, hummus, corn relish and nachos- gosh, we're such gluttons! An evening of endorphins and the 5km run- and neighbours who clean fans and overdose on honey :D

The Sentosa Resort and Spa is spiffy! I thought the meeting would never end though- and we were sitting by the buffet and hadn't had breakfast! Back to an old favourite for lunch, and much love and gushing when a pack of mango cakes arrived all the way from KL, together with our favourite CS girls :D Thanks Seh Kin and Ho Hui! QJ and his misery over the volcanic ash is hilarious :D I do feel bad, though the French ginge jokes were too good to hold back on. Romantically challenged is funny! :D And I've gotten myself hooked on trance! Like Tiesto, and van Buuren. Probably a passing phase :p

Have you noticed how the little things that mean everything to you, can be completely missed by someone else? I guess it goes both ways, and that's what makes all of us different. But there's so much that we leave unsaid, and that's lost too fast between moments to become a memory. Though there's just as much said sometimes, but not understood or remembered.

I'm excited about the next couple of ventures coming up! Sign up for the 'Bare Your Sole' walk people! It's for a good cause, and it'll be fun :D I wish I could actually be there on the other end though- soon I hope, with a little patience and perseverance :)

If only

“You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before, she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect – you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break – her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.”
— Bob Marley

Eyes peeled and mind wide open

The swim left me high and slightly hyperactive- it's those awesome endorphins I tell ya! I'm aching all over now from going overboard this week though. And getting slightly sniffly.

My parking lot moment with the wind in my hair and music in my ears. Cheesy I know, but I was on top of the world and probably looked like a grinning idiot standing there in the dark.

I was told I have a fierce personality and that I'm hard to handle. Haha sure.. *wink*

Synchrony. It's so awesome when someone just gets you, listens and is open to what you have to say, even if they don't necessarily agree. Long chats, long walks and long waits at bustops :)

Another long weekend coming up! Even better this time around since we had no idea it was going to be till yesterday. Plans in the making to leave this town ;)   

Girlfriends. Love you to bits. And happy b'day bestie! The hugs, fits of laughter and random acts of madness will have to wait till the distance and time difference issues are resolved :p Wish you were here though.

I'm really lucky to have such cool parents. They let us get on with our crazy schemes and plans, as long as we don't go too far with anything. The right mix of conservative and open-mindedness :) Their sixth sense freaks me out sometimes though- like they know me better than I do. A heart-to-heart with dad, and it turns out we're both faced with the same kind of decisions and dilemmas.

Lemon muffins, chocolate brownies and too many cups of tea.. ♥

Came across this and it struck a chord:  

When you’re drowning, you don’t say ‘I would be incredibly pleased if someone would have the foresight to notice me drowning and come and help me’, you just scream.
-John Lennon

Leave the memories alone

No no I'm not being emo, it's just a song that's been running on loop all day in my head :p

All in all, it's been quite a week- physically draining and emotionally, a rollercoaster. Sadly more lows than highs, but hey, at least things are starting to look up :) I lost my temper after a very long time too, to the extent I was actually shaking. It's a good thing it doesn't happen that much- I'd have a stroke at age 30 :p

Wendy's on Monday- awesome chilli and shakes almost as good as Carls' Jr. Finally got around to the Book of Eli, with Mr Google and the sibling. The end was lame, but the twist was pretty good- and a little more colour would've been nice! Denzel Washington's getting old though :(

Wednesday heralded the MRT pubcrawl, which involved hundreds of green tshirts taking to the trains and hopping around from a hawker centre to an Irish pub to another Irish pub to an ice bar and finally a club. Our group had quite the mix- I'd never met anyone from Kazakhstan before and I met 4 that night :D And so we drank, talked, wrote on each other's shirts, camwhored and danced :)  I just wish I could remember the cute German guy's name now :p

A late morning, messed up waterworks, a nostalgic pizza + pasta lunch and long walk on Thursday, and the return of chica and QJ. Sunshine, happy stories from all over, and lots of laughs in between- you gotta love the British sense of humour :D

It's weird how songs can mean something completely different when you're down. Humans draw comfort from the strangest things and places, and I'm a living breathing example. The kindness of strangers can make my day, when the comfort of family doesn't always work. Inspiration, from the weirdest place and at the strangest hour- passed it on and got a smile back :)

A lot more people than I ever knew about seem to read my blog, and the interpretations vary quite a bit too- for the most part they amuse me, but some really shock me. To each his own I guess.

A picnic lunch in the park with the girls on Friday :) Haven't done that in ages, and I don't think we've ever chased a bunch of men off so effectively :D Egyptian and Moroccan tea followed, complete with those yummy rosewater dessert things. I'm starting to love the new location :D

Drinks at Blu Jazz in the evening, with our own comfy couch and corner. Good girlfriends are difficult to find, but once you do, they stick with you for life :) A few amazing mozarella cheese sticks later, headed to the much missed and neglected hangout with the boys- we even managed to get our usual table :D Stories of Bangkok and Sri Lanka over long islands, vodka cranberries and jamaican breezes followed- and ended with some pretty deep conversation on soulmates, life plans and finding ourselves. An unusual connection and nice change to the usual banter and racism and insults- and plans in the making for a crazy weekend out on the town- I'm excited :D

Waking up to rain on the weekend is one of the best feelings ever- especially when you can afford to snuggle deeper under the covers and just listen to the raging storm outside. It almost ruined our plans for scrambling around the treetops, but we were lucky and most of us made it in the end :) 3 hours of tarzan jumps, trapeze swings, zip lining across the reservoir and climbing up, down and sideways on everything from cables to rope ladders to nets to tunnels- the adrenaline rush, aching limbs, twisted torsos, sand covered clothes and bruises were worth every minute :D And Hoey Lit and I showed them that even the vertically challenged (specifically, people under 1.65m) can conquer and survive the crazy black level trapeze swing things!

A chilled out Saturday night dinner which turned into an all night Saturday gaming + movie marathon :D A crazy cab roundtrip, teh peng and cheese prata, movie trailers and semi pro cameras, Taio Cruz and Timbaland, dark chocolate education, the sniffles and masala chai, Mortal Combat face offs and lounging on the couch in semi darkness till 6am :D A night to remember. And a Sunday morning sunrise- something I haven't seen in forever~!

Most of Sunday was spent horizontal- just the way I like it :D The shotglasses were finally unpacked, together with my nostalgic meltdown :p Time to myself, music, movies and a few good reads, with room to contemplate and think about the important stuff and where this life is going. I still don't have all the answers, but I'll get there soon. I just need to hang in there for now :)

The hiatus was overcome at long last, with another 5km under my belt. I need to push harder though- it's been too long and I've lost the little stamina I had going before. Library time and two new reads on the shelf- I'm just itching to get started on them! 

And the time has come for me to take a bow, for now. Good night world :)

Don't change a thing, and I'll just hold you here in my memory.

What The Duck

My latest obsession: a wise-cracking, photograph-taking duck.. :D

Destructive criticism
Digital reprography
Fill in the blanks
Less is more
Duck tape

Warning. Danger. Stop. Do Not Cross.

I'm at crossroads again. And in every direction I look, there's an unchanging red light staring right back.

I suppose I could just bide my time and wait for a light to turn green. No guarantees it will though.

Or I could run a red light and find out what's waiting on the other side.

'Too slow to roll
Put your life on hold,
An open path
With nowhere to go

A chance to breathe
While sitting at a red light,
You look around
reflecting on your life..'

-Jonny Lang

'We are all of us stars, and we deserve to twinkle'

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."
- Marilyn Monroe

For those wounded in love

From Paulo Coelho's Blog: Convention of those wounded in love

General provisions:

A – Whereas the saying “all is fair in love and war” is absolutely correct;

B – Whereas for war we have the Geneva Convention, approved on 22 August 1864, which provides for those wounded in the battle field, but until now no convention has been signed concerning those wounded in love, who are far greater in number;

It is hereby decreed that:

Article 1 – All lovers, of any sex, are alerted that love, besides being a blessing, is also something extremely dangerous, unpredictable and capable of causing serious damage. Consequently, anyone planning to love should be aware that they are exposing their body and soul to various types of wounds, and that they shall not be able to blame their partner at any moment, since the risk is the same for both.

Article 2 – Once struck by a stray arrow fired from Cupid’s bow, they should immediately ask the archer to shoot the same arrow in the opposite direction, so as not to be afflicted by the wound known as “unrequited love”. Should Cupid refuse to perform such a gesture, the Convention now being promulgated demands that the wounded partner remove the arrow from his/her heart and throw it in the garbage. In order to guarantee this, those concerned should avoid telephone calls, messages over the Internet, sending flowers that are always returned, or each and every means of seduction, since these may yield results in the short run but always end up wrong after a while. The Convention decrees that the wounded person should immediately seek the company of other people and try to control the obsessive thought: “this person is worth fighting for”.

Article 3 – If the wound is caused by third parties, in other words if the loved one has become interested in someone not in the script previously drafted, vengeance is expressly forbidden. In this case, it is allowed to use tears until the eyes dry up, to punch walls or pillows, to insult the ex-partner in conversations with friends, to allege his/her complete lack of taste, but without offending their honor. The Convention determines that the rule contained in Article 2 be applied: seek the company of other persons, preferably in places different from those frequented by the other party.

Article 4 – In the case of light wounds, herein classified as small treacheries, fulminating passions that are short-lived, passing sexual disinterest, the medicine called Pardon should be applied generously and quickly. Once this medicine has been applied, one should never reconsider one’s decision, not even once, and the theme must be completely forgotten and never used as an argument in a fight or in a moment of hatred.

Article 5 – In all definitive wounds, also known as “breaking up”, the only medicine capable of having an effect is called Time. It is no use seeking consolation from fortune-tellers (who always say that the lost lover will return), romantic books (which always have a happy ending), soap-operas on the television or other such things. One should suffer intensely, completely avoiding drugs, tranquilizers and praying to saints. Alcohol is only tolerated if kept to a maximum of two glasses of wine a day.

Final determination : Those wounded in love, unlike those wounded in armed conflict, are neither victims nor torturers. They chose something that is part of life, and so they have to accept both the agony and the ecstasy of their choice.

And those who have never been wounded in love will never be able to say: “I have lived”. Because they haven’t.

[Stef my love, I love you more for sharing this! :D]


Position: square one. Displacement: beyond measure.

I went through the motions: the hoping, waiting and wondering. I passed the anxiety, anger and panic. Frustration, check. Worry, check. Bated breath, check.

Fleeting happiness, renewed optimism, interspersed between all the negativity, at the slightest shift in sequence.

The decision, the outcome, the implications. And finding my way back to where I began.

Things don't always work out the way you want them to. Why couldn't this time be different though?

A drop in the ocean

April began on a happy note :) The lack of pranks aside, I got to mediate a brain storming session and the team came up with some pretty good ideas- which are now plastered on the windows around me :D Good news in the post too- one battle won for now, though the war continues. Made someone smile, and cheered someone else up. It's those little things and split second moments that make your day :)

Lunch time adventures with QJ, which started with my Moroccan lunch treat on Tuesday and then took us back to our usual hangout. We complained about it when we were close enough, but we can't stop going back there now :p Chica had news too- I'm so happy for you babe :D There was a ray of sunlight dancing around on my desk (and tanning my redheaded neighbour) and my pod read my mind again :) One big bubble of happiness inside me.

Evocation that evening, in VIP seats! Thanks Nips- I owe you another round :D The performance was an unorthodox mix of electronic and beats, contemporary dance and unusual choregraphy- my favourites were the Indian/Javanese dance to Fade to Black, and the 'organic' dance piece with the earthy beats and subtle lighting (I can't remember the name of it :p). A happy dinner followed, with too much laughing and talk of 'waiting for something to happen'...

Then came the weekend! Road tripping, caving, 10km of white water kayakking, zip lining, building a jacuzzi, pigging out, riding atop kayaks on a lorry, cheering on Man U, pigging out some more, driving around in circles to prove the boys wrong and lots of old town white coffee in between. Ipoh, we'll be back someday :)